"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise , so that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Slaves, be obedient to those who are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in the sincerity of your heart, as to Christ; not by way of eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart. With good will render service , as to the Lord, and not to men, knowing that whatever good thing each one does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether slave or free. And masters, do the same things to them, and give up threatening, knowing that Both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no partiality with Him." -Ephesians 6:1-9
I'm not going to waste your time by boring you with all of the details, but I think just maybe you can tell by the title of this post that things did not go quite as well today as they did yesterday. In fact, today was the total opposite of yesterday. With the exception of speech therapy, Haven was very uncooperative. It didn't matter what we tried to do to calm her, convince her, reassure her, and encourage her, she just cried...and cried...and cried. She told the therapists 'no' and screamed for her Mama. I felt terrible for the wonderful therapists who were assigned to work with Haven today. I felt badly for poor Brenna who probably lost some of her hearing while witnessing this screaming banshee situation for the first time. I felt badly for Levi who just wanted a little attention from his mom; a mom who was unable to give it because of one feisty little girl.
Over the weekend our oldest son Micah pointed out that Haven's scars from her heart surgery resemble a bright red exclamation point. We laughed at how fitting that is for her feisty personality. That big personality of hers was really working for her in the early stages of therapy, but we seem to have hit a wall today when our little gal refused to stand, walk, or cooperate in any way shape or form while the rest of us sat by helpless to help her. I was really feeling frustrated as we left the therapy unit this afternoon. I felt frustrated that no matter how much I wanted to help my little girl relearn things like how to stand up by herself, roll over, and walk without assistance, there was nothing more that I could do. It's certainly a helpless feeling.
During this past month, I've been surprisingly introspective. I'm amazed by the lessons that God has been teaching me. (Full-time theologians please don't tear me apart...I recognize my weaknesses, but I feel so compelled to share what God placed upon my heart today. I trust that God can use these humble words for His purpose!) Today, in a quiet moment while Haven was sleeping, I meditated on John 3:16 which says, "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life." I contemplated how Haven's team of doctors, therapists, parents, and siblings are offering her the gift of recovery that she can either accept or reject. It's impossible for Haven to recover by refusing help, insisting that things stay the same, and not trusting the ones sent to help her; she must submit to the will of her team to recover. She can't earn her recovery simply by flashing her gorgeous smile or manipulating people to allow her to take life easy and do things for her. No way! Haven has to choose to obey and do what we all know is best for her. Similarly, God gives mankind the freedom to accept or reject the free gift of salvation that can only be found in Christ Jesus. We can't get to heaven on our terms, living our lives the way we want, allowing society to shape our views on God. We cannot use works to get us to heaven, or ignore the fact that acceptance of God's gift of salvation means submitting to His will - not our own like little Haven is trying to do. We have to trust Him, obey Him, and accept the gift He offers.
Of course, Haven is a mere toddler, and I expect her to act like one. She had a bad day today, but I'm praying that tomorrow will be better. I pray that God will help Haven to trust and obey her team and that He will give her the gift of a full recovery from this stroke for His glory! More than that, I pray that Haven will know God and accept Him as her Savior one day. I know that He can do mighty things with a will as strong as hers and I believe that He has a fantastic plan for her life. It is my continued prayer for my daughter and our family that God will work things together for good through this situation. God is good! He promises He will and I'm watching for it!
No comments:
Post a Comment